Getting Respect on the Streets: So many bookings, so little clothing

Respect

Sure, the classic view of wrestlers is that they are not particularly sophisticated or stylish (unless it’s part of a gimmick like Gorgeous George).

However, there are different levels of style in the professional wrestling world. Some guys pull it off, others don’t or require more help than maybe necessary. Below is a mix of Those That Do and Those That Don’t.

Shawn Michaels

shawn michaels camo

Note to Shawn: stop dressing like a hick. Michaels reportedly has a net worth of $17 million, allegedly putting him in the list of the top 15 richest wrestlers. And yet, he continues to go around openly wearing wife beaters and camo all over the joint. Heck, even when he wears a tuxedo, he opts for the rarely used camo vest. I’d also suggest that he shave a bit more often. His facial hair is either too thick or too long to pull off the stubble look.         

John Cena

cena shirt

Another minor intervention: you don’t have to wear your merch 24/7. Sure, he’s been seen going formal for appropriate events, but any other time he’s on TV and DVDs, and at Make-A-Wish events, he’s decked out in his rainbow swag. He’s the face of the company, and, more importantly, he looks like the face of the company (facially and bodily). I’d suggest he go for the Armani a bit more often. Though, to be fair, he does dress up from time to time. But, those bright-colored t-shirts are just so distracting. I’d also like him to drop the jorts and go back to military grade shorts.

The Miz

miz suit

The Miz loves his suits, and particularly loves being seen in them. This is kind of a problem. He’s too showy, and the suits become a distraction. The man should be the focus (#patrickbateman). Alex Riley, despite some questionable tie choices, I think pulls it off a bit more, if only because he has less of a “douchey” aura.

CM Punk

punk

Despite the unprofessional manner in which he left WWE, he’s a smart cookie. He got a fairly constant push since he started (despite what he would tell you) and made plenty of money so he can settle into retirement. He also seems to save a lot of money on things like shampoo and clothing. His punk rock look works for him perfectly. Cena looks like he should wear a suit, Punk looks like he should dress the way he already does. He also probably smells, since I assume he saves money on laundry detergent and other soaps, too.

Dolph Ziggler

Dolph-Ziggler-Goggles

Dolph has the name of a 1980s action movie villain and matching bleached blonde curls. To match this, he’s all about sport coats and t-shirts/dress shirts with no ties in the fun late 80s/early 90s neon colors. This is easy to make fun of, but it’s awesome too. Miami Vice, in the house.

Jerry “The King” Lawler

jerry lawler

King is an absolute legend, and should appear on camera as one more often. He earned his title, having allegedly (and maybe not) sold out the Mid South Coliseum more times that Elvis Presley. So, it would be nice if he brought back the crown and jacket. This Affliction/Ed Hardy thing just doesn’t work. Combined with his current, admitted lack of enthusiasm, it’s just sad.

Daniel Bryan

danielbryan

Bryan’s on the same level as Punk. Being the Second Most Famous/Relevant Person from Aberdeen, Wash., he does the logger/grunge thing from time to time. He also goes for athletic wear and formal wear (sometimes). He basically dresses normally, and to match the occasion. Like Punk, it works for him. Unlike Punk, he doesn’t seem pretentious about it. He just seems normal, which may not work for a “Superstar,” but it makes him easy to relate to. He gets a B+.

Michael P.S. Hayes

michael ps hayes

The Bizarro Larry Zbyszko has a huge head of bleached blonde hair. Nothing wrong with that, but his hairline is receding and the mighty mane appears to be on the thin side. He also has a thing for Stetsons and bolo ties. Michael (or Dok Hendrix, as some might prefer) has not aged as gracefully some other guys in the business. On the other hand, he doesn’t dress that way all the time and chooses to live in reality fairly regularly. Since he is a continuing top executive at WWE, this is comforting to know.

Jim Ross

jr

He also likes his western wear, but it’s J.R., so its a-OK.

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